to be on my own. reconciling, i think, the need for community, commitment, intimacy, and the need for solitude. it is a problem i have wrestled with and there was no precedent for it. tavis: this conversation will get me in trouble and i was reluctant to even have it with you because it brings up personal drama. >> he realized a lot of people have this issue. this whole notion that we should be together all the time or we are not is crazy. and so i find it a very common ailment and i suppose in days long ago, men would be gone for a long time and come back. my wife -- we have us, and that i can have me.